Geert,
Quite a few things here.
First, we have to remember we are talking about behaviorial aspects here not structural. As such, and I'm having a bit of trouble expressing this so please bear with me. The concept of one behavior "owning another" doesn't fit too well. Hence I prefer to use the term "knows about" or "knows something about". If we go back to the old cell phone example,
usecase:connect call and
usecase:time call and
usecase:create call charge maybe all somehow related, but there is no concept that any one of them "owns" another.
BTW I'm talking from the point of view of the cell, not the phone.
So, we better add another
usecase:pass connection, which only occurs/is invoked when the cell passes an active call off to another cell.
For the sake of the argument,
time call and
create call charge are both "includes" of the connect call use case. Just accept this and lets get back to the extends issue.
pass connection is an extension, its outcome is to "hand off an active connection to the next cell providing all necessary continuity". It extends
connect call and it does only under specific conditions. Like "call is still active" and "(whatever technical blah blah says to hand it off)".
My (re-)reading of section 16 has now suggested to me that,
pass connection knows nothing about the
connect call use case, it's goal (outcome) is self contained and its invocation (stimulus) may have come from a
connect call or from another
pass connection invocation as a result of a call being passed from cell to cell to cell. That is what I was alluding to.
For some years

, I have been writing extending cases as if they automatically "knew" what they were extending. (Not always, just sometimes.) It was only after curiosity into zyx's quandry that I got the proverbial self-slap on the self-wrist.
The more I thought about the business of the extending case knowing nowt about the extended case, the more it actually makes sense.
It seems to me (tonight) that the relationship knows more about the situation than either of the use cases does. (Which kinda makes sense to me, because I always had a feeling that it was the extend that knew about the extension point, not the original use case. But better minds than mine have decided otherwise.
anyway, cheers
bruce